Monday, August 30, 2010 | By: Tangy

t-minus 26 days!!

Today was my first day of no cheating, a while. I really was good today! I never felt deprived or hungry and I hope the rest of the month is just as good! I hope I didn't overdo the carbs, as usual, but I really did try to watch them! According to, I ate 1792 cals, 115.7 g protein, 58.7 g fat, and 206.7 g carbs. My nutrient ratio was 45:26:29 instead of 40:30:30. Close, but I will try to do better tomorrow!! I am proud that I didn't do any mindless snacking today which I can contribute to staying busy! Today just flew by for me. I think keeping my mind occupied is really going to be a key factor in my weight loss! Today I kept the downstairs of my house mostly picked up all day and I did some online window-shopping for fall and winter clothes for the kids. If I had an extra $300 laying around right now, they'd be the most styling kids in town!

Here's what I ate today:

Breakfast- baked chicken breast with italian seasoning (leftover, cold straight from the fridge!)

snack- smoothie with whey, flax, spinach, rice milk, and golden fruit blend

lunch- 2 slices of ezekial, toasted with 1 tbsp all-nat pb and 1 tsp raspberry preserves

snack- 1 cup rice milk with 1 scoop chocolate whey, 1/2 apple with 1 tbsp pb

dinner- 6 of the crispy chicken bites (tosca recipe) and 1.5 sweet potatoes--cut up and very very lightly tossed in olive oil and sprinkled with lots of cinnamon. where I went wrong with my carbs! I sliced up 2 sweet potatoes into fries and I ate damn near the whole pan of them!! I didn't miss the sugar at all that I usually put on and I could have eaten another whole tray of them! gosh they are good!

Today's workout- p90x arms and shoulders with ab ripper x--probably my very favorite p90x workout!! I love doing arms and it was straight lifting today, no pushups or pullups! I was going to take my dog out for a run (I arranged for my mom to stop over every night this week so I could take the dog out since Pete is gone) but when my mom got here I had *just* taken my dinner out of the oven so I had to just do a brisk walk! We walked for 30 minutes, so I'm guessing around 2 miles. Not something I'd count as a workout but it was out and moving nonetheless!

Tomorrow I would like for my eating to be as good as today or better and I have yoga and as always my goal is to get through as much of it as possible--last time I did 45 min so maybe this time I can shoot for a whole hour! The yoga x workout is a crazy 90 minutes long!
Sunday, August 29, 2010 | By: Tangy


Friday night I went out without Pete or the kids to do something other than grocery shopping or going to a doctor's appointment for the first time...ever! Really! I do not get out much! lol I was in a hurry to get my kids and my house ready for my mother in law to come over to babysit and I ordered them a pizza and breadsticks. **smacks forehead** Of course my biggest weakness, over all other things, is pizza, and I had 3 pieces. Not horrible, but still. Then I made myself a yummy frozen mixed drink-- simply lemonade, bicardi razz, frozen raspberries, and of course lots of ice! It was sooo good and I took it with me to go play Bunco for the first time.

I was good at Bunco other than my big drink...there was spinach dip and alfredo dip and bread and crackers and some kind of oreo-pudding dessert and I can proudly say I did not try even one bite of any of that stuff! I had a good time playing even though my anxiety level was through the roof and I felt like the new kid in school. Of course, I was the night's big loser with only 2 wins and 14 losses! haha. I have never had good luck. I won a prize for being the biggest loser--a bottle of wine! I haven't opened it yet but I think I will keep it tucked away for my sister's wedding.

My husband and I got home about the same time on Friday night and I had a big surprise for him--no kids! My mother in law had decided to keep them at her house overnight so we had a kid-free night that started at midnight. We were both exhausted and there is zero midnight entertainment in this town besides the bar so we stayed up and talked and ate ice cream and slept in til 10:30 on Saturday morning! Needless to say, after my night of pizza and booze, I felt like CRAP when I woke up. Total crap. My eyes were burning from my allergies, too. The icing on the cake was that good ole Aunt Flo had also decided to show up that morning. Thank you mother nature!! F#*& you too! Oh- and I had a wedding shower to go to and I had my first fitting for my bridesmaids dress for my sister's wedding.

I had tried on a size 10 dress the last week of April and it fit me perfectly. I was of course hoping to be in a 6 or an 8 by September. ha. When they "officially" measured me in July they suggested I get a size 12 and I told them to shove it (not in those words of course hehe) and ordered the 10. Yesterday, I could not zip it up. I am really hoping it was just from the bloating--I weighed in at a whopping 169 yesterday!! gahhh! So I really do not have the time to go to the tailor's and get it altered and then go pick it up a different day. I just don't. Not to mention I don't want to spend any more money than I've already had to spend for this wedding--I think I have spent almost as much as I did on my own wedding! And I want to just have the satisfaction of knowing I am no size 12. Pffft.

I have always worked better under pressure and I'm hoping this time is no different! I was infamous (to myself at least) for writing all my college English papers with less than 3 hours to spare and still getting an A on every single one so if I can do that, I can lose some pesky poundage and extra inches to fit into this dress!! My gameplan is to cut down my starchy carbs by a LOT--once a day, and eat more veggies and proteins and even start cutting down on my fruit. I know my problem isn't with my workouts which have been good and consistent so I will just keep up with those. I am really hoping this works! Wish me luck!
Thursday, August 26, 2010 | By: Tangy

ABSolutely fABulous

Week 1 photo. The first of many weeks to come! (excuse my dirty mirror and redneck workout room!) ps- for those who have less-than-perfect tummies, ie. stretch marks--I recommend the cell phone pic! Less detail=good thing. I wish my abs looked so nice up-close and personal ;)

Okay, let's face is all about the abs. I can track my progress all I want and weigh and measure until I am blue in the face but until I lose this muffin-top and get the rock-hard abs I want, I will not be finished with my weight-loss journey. Can you see my little 4-pack in my upper abs?!?! Is it just me or IS IT THERE?!

One day, these darn lower abs WILL match the upper abs! I will be combating this with my clean eating and adding some more intense cardio--running intervals for now!

So today is the big day. Time to see if I have lost anything! Drumroll please...

Today's weight-- 166. psssssshhhhhhtttt. Oddly enough, I am not discouraged by this. I have come up with a number of possible scenarios for this bizzare number.

#1- my weight last week was not accurate. Highly possible on this scale. I got a different number depending on where I put it in my house but 166 was the most occuring number today. Or this week's number is wrong.

#2- I have a muscle gain

#3- I am still retaining water from Wednesday's salty pizza and am still bloated from this week's pinto bean kick.

#4- I really did gain 2 lbs from my poor eating.

All are possible explanations. I also measured today. Here is a side-by-side comparison of today vs July 13 vs June 1 2009 (I cannot find my complete list of measurements from 09 but you can really see how much I've lost since last year!)

Today/ July 13/June 1(last year)

weight- 166 165 180

bust- 36 37 x

chest- 32 33 36

waist- 30 31 39

tummy- 37 38.5 x

hips- 39 40 47

thighs- 23 24.5 25
arms- 11 12 x

I may not have lost any weight (or maybe I did...who knows!) but I have been steadily losing inches which is what counts!! I'm not sure what a good measurement for my lower abs would be. I'm shooting for 34 or less by my birthday on October 26. I saw on the news last night that the average American woman's waistline is 37 inches!! WOW! We have a major problem in this country! I'm really not surprised.

I started off today with my usual coffee and a smoothie. Today's fruit was Schwan's golden fruit blend. It's my all-time favorite kind of smoothie. Like a big ole glass of summer!
Lunch will be a chicken/lettuce/honey mustard/cheese wrap and some apple slices with peanut butter. I'll have another smoothie for a snack and dinner will be more spaghetti! I'll be getting my drink on later tonight--one glass worth since I'm a lightweight! I am thinking Bicardi Razz with some lemonade and frozen raspberries and ice all blended up! One drink once a month can't be too bad, right?!?!
Today's workout was a 5-mile run. I was hoping to finally break my distance barrier of 8 miles but 2 miles into my run I knew it wasn't going to happen today! I had to stop after mile 2 for a walking water break and then again after mile 3 and I started to run again and ran about half of mile 4 when I had to stop--OMG those damn pinto beans have me running to the bathroom 6x a day!!! I had to walk and squeeze!! hahahaha The feeling finally passed and I decided mile 5 should be intervals...2 minutes hard, 1 minute easy. I made it 90 seconds into the first one and I felt like I was gonna die!! I don't know what is wrong with me today--I should have no problems running 5 miles on a nice day without the stroller. I'll just chalk it up as an off day and hope for a better run next time on Sunday! Right after my run, I grabbed some more water and a chocolate-coconut larabar for some much-needed fuel and then did p90x arms and back with ab ripper x. Made it through that just fine and I could even notice a difference in my strength!!! I was cranking out the pushups like I've never done before aaaannnnndddd I can finally do the military-style ones!! I still have to be on my knees for those kind (all toes for the other kinds!) but I never even had the strength before to go all the way down and come back up and today I could!!! BIG milestone for me! I wasn't able to do the diamond pushups or the dive-bombers--I am still having some kind of issue with my hip flexor (I think that is what is hurting, anyway) on my left side. It bugs the CRAP out of me while I'm running and I can't do any wide-leg pushups or exercises because it hurts so bad!! I hope with time it will stop hurting! I tried to exaggerate my stride today to fully stretch out my legs and I think that helped me get through my run. Oh and I weighed again after my workouts and subsequent trips to the bathroom and I was at 164. So maybe by tonight I'll hit 162! LOL
Tomorrow will be plyo so I will take the day off from running unless I feel really really good tomorrow night! I have another wedding shower, this one at a really yummy Italian restaurant....hello starchy carb city! I just want to get through the day and not hate myself. I won't beat myself up but I want to come with a full stomach and healthy snack in-hand and have plenty of water to drink! I'll keep it simple since tomorrow is Saturday :)

and one last look at this tummy....GOOD BYE!!!!

p90x week 1: completed!

After a much-needed reality check I think I have my head and my heart in the right place again. I'm not sure why I get in such low funks sometimes and why I am so hard on myself! I am so anxious about tomorrow's weigh-in! I know I've done a good job with my workouts this week but my eating is still not where it needs to be--but I hope it is enough to see a change on the scale! Besides the two times I have had pizza, my other food has been good and clean.

Today's breakfast was a smoothie with strawberry and peaches as my fruits. I had a slice of fresh out of the oven, warm banana bread (clean recipe!) for my midmorning snack. And some fresh pineapple--I finally cut my first pineapple and it was so easy with my new sharp knive (thanks mom!) and just soo delicious and refreshing! Lunch was 2 ww tortillas spread thick with refried beans, 1/2 chicken breast (1/4 each tortilla), and cheese. Very yummy and filling! I made the kids cheese pizzas on ww english muffins and the boys even asked for seconds. I would like to start phasing my kids to eating as clean as I do!

I ate a late lunch so I wasn't very hungry for an afternoon snack but I had cut up two apples for the boys with some peanut butter so I had two slices with pb also. Dinner was Ronzoni Healthy Harvest pasta with spaghetti sauce and it really hit the spot! Today is my rest day and my body really appreciates that!

Tomorrow I will update with my weigh-in and hopefully get some running done besides my p90x! And it WILL be a good eating day!@
Wednesday, August 25, 2010 | By: Tangy

Life takes over

Sometimes I feel like I am destined to be fat forever. I will do so well and then I will just impulsively do the most stupid things! I have done pretty well so far with my endeavor and maybe it is just my inner pessimist but I feel like I am not doing enough and I won't see any pounds or inches lost this Friday when I weigh and measure next. And it's only Wednesday! I don't know why I have these feelings. I have been overweight ever since I can remember and I guess I still think like a fat girl. It's a huge challenge for me to look at my body and be happy. I do realize now that I am at least on the high (or very high) range for a "normal weight" person and while that is a big step for me, all I can see is flaws. I don't think I am being too hard on myself or unrealistic. I am working harder than I've ever worked in my whole life to eat healthy and I've never pushed myself further during exercise but I know I can still do better. I want to run a marathon. I want to do 10 pullups without breaking a sweat. I want to have amazing legs and arms and abs. Can I get there on my current path?? I don't know. And the thought of what I have to do to get there can be overwhelming at times and when I get overwhelmed, I tend to shut down and make stupid, rash, impulsive decisions.

Like today. I noticed Riley wasn't her normal, cheery, happiest-girl-in-the-world usual self this afternoon. She felt really hot last night (she ends up in our bed with us at least 4 nights a week) but she was perfectly happy all morning and played at the park with her normal enthusiasm. After lunch, we were outside enjoying the perfect weather and she was unusually clingy, and then she threw up all over. Poor thing. She went down for a second nap--also very rare for her--and when I got her up at 5:30 she still wasn't feeling well. I blew off kenpo today because I had decided I'd rather take the kids out for a run tonight and enjoy the weather while building up my running endurance some more. I don't feel comfortable doing that now...sick kid + bouncy stroller= disaster! So I may end up doing kenpo after all tonight.

But back to my stupidity...I didn't plan anything for dinner because we were outside all day. And for some reason Riley being sick was also my excuse not to do any cooking. Which makes no sense. I went to the local grocery store (read: SMALLEST store you've ever seen--I've been in bigger gas stations than our grocery store) and saw the Coke in the cooler and instantly craved it and I put a 2 liter of it in my cart! I KNEW it was stupid and bad for me! And then I got some frozen pizza for dinner. I want to hang my head in shame. Being prepared seems to be my biggest weakness.

I feel like my life has been so stressful and chaotic that I haven't been able to fully focus or concentrate on anything for at least five years. I feel so unorganized and un-scheduled and it really interferes with all aspects of my life! Especially when it comes to taking care of myself. Sometimes I just want to pick the easiest way out like I did today and it's those kinds of choices that I make that really make me wonder if I'll ever be able to finally lose this weight.
Tuesday, August 24, 2010 | By: Tangy
Another great day for me! I am feeling so good these days physically! I started my day off with my usual coffee and smoothie. I also had 2 scrambled eggs and a slice of ww banana bread (recipe found under ww banana bread on Not all at once, of course, but between the hours of 7 and 1.

I had p90x legs and back for my afternoon workout. For some reason I just wasn't into the workout today and I don't feel like I got a whole lot out of it. I did, however, really notice how my abs are getting more defined--not so much slimmer yet, though.

Lunch was leftovers from last night's dinner. A ww tortilla spread thick with my homemade refried beans, about 1/4 cut up grilled chicken breast, and a little sharp cheddar cheese, all warmed up in the microwave. Super easy and filling! I'm not going to lie, though, I was craving Ben and Jerry's Chubby Hubby ice cream like crazy this's been months and months since I've had any but that craving just HIT me! I settled for a big spoonful of crunchy peanut butter with a little squirt of Hershey's syrup...definitely not clean but it took care of my craving!

I had a big bag of tomatoes my mom had dropped off for me. It had been sitting in my kitchen at least a week and I kept thinking, "I NEED to do something with these" but I never did and I was beginning to think they were all just going to go bad because I just had not made the initiative! During p90x, Tony has you "call out your soup" when doing a particular stretch. His soup was tomato basil. That made me think, hmmm...I have tomatoes, I have basil (leftover from when I made pesto--about 2 cups worth) and I've been wanting some good, healthy soup, so I decided to make some! I had no idea how to go about this but I just gave it a whirl and you know what, it turned out great! I took a lot of tomatoes--some regular size, some roma, and threw them in boiling water for about a minute and then rinsed them right away in cold water. They peeled so easily after that--thank you Mandie for the heads up! Then I put my tomatoes and basil (minus the stems) in my blender and hit puree and it blended it all up! I transfered it back to the big pot on the stove, added some chicken broth, milk, and 1/2 tsp sea salt and let it simmer for a while. That's it! It was soo good!

Then I was trying to think of something to go with my soup and I remembered seeing a recipe for clean corn bread from I made a few substitutions for ingredients I didn't have but otherwise followed the recipe--and wow! It was the best cornbread I've ever had. So tasty! I love that it has a cup of frozen corn in it! So my cornbread, with my soup, was just such a great summer supper!

Tonight I took my dog out for a run...we ran about 2 miles and walked one more. Overall, I'm happy with today although now I see I may have had too many carbs for one day so I will be extra cautious for the next couple of days. Tomorrow I'd like to do some more baking and finish my first week (again x6 lol) of p90x. Another run would be a bonus, too :)
Whew, I was up too last last night to update so I'll do it now! I have been cooking like crazy and I plan on cooking and baking for the rest of the week! Yesterday I started off my day with a smoothie--spinach, rice milk, whey, flax, a banana, and frozen strawberries.

Then I had a handful of pecans. I have been wanting to make some homemade onion-free salsa since I am an onion-hater. I finally did yesterday! I put in 1 jalepeno pepper, 2 green peppers, 4 tomatoes, 3 cloves of garlic,about a half cup of fresh cilantro, 2 tbsp lime juice, and 1/2 tsp each cumin, sea salt, and pepper.
Then it was off to the fridge to let the flavors blend in time for dinner! I had a bag of pinto beans soaking so I could make homemade refried beans to go with our Mexican-themed dinner. For lunch I was trying to think of something fun and healthy to make the kids. I had some Barilla Plus bow-tie pasta which is just a really fun shape for kids...and for me, too! I had made some fresh pesto a couple days ago so I heated some of that up in the pan after I had cooked the noodles, then tossed it with the noodles and added some cut-up grilled chicken breast. Here's my little munchkin enjoying it!

and my portion

When the beans were done soaking, I drained and rinsed them and filled them back up and let them boil for about 2 hours. I added cumin, paprika, pepper, sea salt, garlic powder, onion powder, and cayenne pepper. I added those same spices to my thawed chicken breasts before grilling them and we had chicken/bean/cheese quesadillas with the homemade fresh salsa and a little sour cream--mostly for Pete and the kids. They were a hit! So tasty!
We were all in the mood for a little dessert after the hot day so I made the banana ice cream once again, with 4 frozen bananas, 1 cup milk, 2 tbsp agave, and 2 tbsp cocoa powder.

Yesterday's workout was yoga. It felt good to have an easy day after 4 hard days and it really helped stretch out all my tight leg muscles! My goals for today are to do p90x legs and back (which is done now!) and to go running and continue to eat clean.

Sunday, August 22, 2010 | By: Tangy

Shower Time!

Today was a great workout day! I got up and went running! I wanted to finally see if I could break my distance barrier of 8 miles. I knew after mile 4 that it was just not going to happen today! I was ready to stop running already. I made myself do 6. Mile 5 was all downhill so that felt really nice and I was still a mile away from home so I had no choice but to get that last mile in. I was disappointed but I guess my body was still tired from yesterday! It's been quite a while since I ran anything over 3 miles! I burned only 630 calories on my run today but my time was 6 minutes faster than yesterday, right at 57:03. Just goes to show that the stroller may slow me down, but it sure is a calorie-burner! I'll try to keep that in mind the next time I need to run and I don't really want to take the kids with me! Tomorrow, however, will be a day off from running and I will only be doing p90x yoga. I did 40 minutes of p90x arms and shoulders today before I had to stop and chase after the kids. Pete was mowing and I had to keep them away from the mower and away from the street. Pre-run I ate a slice of Ezekial toast with Smucker's all-natural peanut butter and after I had finished with the strength training I had 3 whole scrambled eggs with pepper and paprika.

Then my trouble started. I had to get ready for my sister's wedding shower at 2 and I fully intended on making myself a smoothie for lunch right before but time just slipped away and before I knew it my mom was outside waiting for me. Luckily, there was fresh fruit there! I loaded up with strawberries, pineapple, blueberries, honeydew, and cantelope. Unfortunately I couldn't get as much as I would have liked ;) I had 1/2 slice of jello cake that did not taste good whatsoever--it tasted fake and sugary! Amazing how my tastes have changed! I also did not bring my water bottle I had ready-to-go at home so I had a small glass of punch that was also just LOADED with sugar! yuck! But it was a great shower and my sister got a lot of great things for her apartment! Since no one else was taking any photos, I nominated myself designated photo-taker and took a lot of random pictures there!

Here's Amber and I

and then me with all 3 of my sisters

Then right after the shower I took the kids over to see my family at my grandparents' house...and still did not eat anything! 5:30 came around and I was feeling pretty famished! They ordered pizza and I devoured 3 pieces! I felt awful but I was so hungry! Ugh! Today was just not a day where I was prepared. Tomorrow will be better! Goals for tomorrow: sincerely attempt to do all 90 minutes of p90x yoga and not skip any meals and finally get my baking done!
Saturday, August 21, 2010 | By: Tangy

Day 2

Today had another great start!! My husband had to leave early for work for his last day at his current job (yay!) so I had no choice but to load them up and take them with me running this morning. The weather was almost perfect--about 75* but humid, a nice breeze, overcast and not too sunny! I felt great during my run! I decided I was going to go for distance so I was at a 10 minute pace, hoping I would make it 10 miles today! I took my long 6-mile loop around town and out in the country and for the last 4 I was going to go weave in between my other route--kind of hard to explain--but it required me to run right past our house right after the 6 mile mark. Mistake. The kids saw home and got so excited--they had been in the stroller for the past hour, afterall, and they just got out of hand when I kept on running past, so I stopped and walked around the block for my cooldown, with my son throwing a temper tantrum the whole time. Ugh. I hope 4 is going to be an easier year than 3 for us! But I am glad I at least got an hour of running in today. I burned 800 calories and I've never had a better 6-miler than today as far as quality of the run. I've run it much faster before but today was just great.

I had to shower and run errands after the run and I didn't get around to making lunch til 2 this afternoon. I was HUNGRY! I did munch on a tiny triangle corner of cold pizza before I went running but that was all I'd had all day. I made Tosca's Crispy Chicken Bites from and I cut up 3 sweet potatoes into fries and tossed them lightly with olive oil, a few sprinkles of organic raw cane sugar, and a ton of cinnamon. I baked them at 450* for about 25 minutes--delicious! I keep making them healthier and healthier every time. I used to make them with butter. Next time I will try omitting the sugar so they are truly Clean!

I was still stuffed from my lunch at 7:00! I might have had a bit too many of the fries! I could not stop eating them but I figured, hey, they're veggies! LOL I definitely ate at least half of them all to myself. I will definitely start making them at least once a week. I had 5 of the chicken bites; one serving was 4. My late dinner was a smoothie. It had my usuals--spinach, rice milk, flax, and whey, and this time I put in a banana and a tbsp of cocoa powder. Riley really enjoyed it, too!

I was planning on doing plyo tonight...honestly, I am pooped!! I just want to hit the sack early and see if I can get up early for a solo run--maybe get a new distance PR! And if I did plyo then I'd have to eat again and I don't feel like cooking! haha

Tomorrow's goals-- eat clean, get in a good run (or bike ride if I'm too stiff) and do p90x arms and shoulders. Do some clean baking for my family--banana bread, pancakes, muffins--and maybe even make salsa and spaghetti sauce.

on a side note--I cannot ever get this page to load correctly and it isn't letting me upload pictures!! Anyone more internet savvy than me who knows how to fix this??
Friday, August 20, 2010 | By: Tangy

Day 1

Today started off great. I woke up at the unholy hour of 6am and went running with my dog Clark. I started off walking but Clark wasn't having any of that. We ran 3.5 miles and I'm glad I had him there to make me do it. It's funny how Clark is merely power walking while I am running at my distance pace.

Fridays are my official weigh-in days and today's weight: 164.4. A HUGE sigh of relief this morning. All week I had been coming in at 166. I will never let myself get over 165 again. Next week I really would like to see 162!! I'm going to add in all the extra cardio I can to melt this fat off!

Breakfast was 2 scrambled eggs, with a sprinkle of paprika. And my coffee, of course. I always drink two cups sweetened with a little agave, a teaspoon of cocoa powder, and a little half and half. I know, I should be using rice milk or almond milk, but it just doesn't taste the same.

I had a smoothie for my morning snack. 2 big handfuls of fresh baby spinach, a handful of fresh pineapple, a cup of rice milk, a scoop of vanilla whey, 2 tbsp ground flax, and frozen strawberries and peaches. So yummy. As usual, the kids were immediately asking me if they could have a drink. I don't think I've ever gotten a whole smoothie to myself.

My mom brought me some fresh organic basil yesterday so today I made pesto! I was going through some old food journals when I came across one of my old favorites that I had somehow forgotten--a chicken pesto panini. I had some chicken thawing in the fridge so I took it and sprinkled it with pepper, garlic powder, paprika, and a little sea salt and thew it on the Foreman grill. I sliced up 4 potatoes into fries and seasoned them the same way as the chicken, and lightly tossed them with olive oil. I baked them at 450* for about 40 minutes, flipping them three times. I don't know why anyone would want to buy a bag of frozen fries when you can buy a big bag of potatoes for $5 and make your own fries and have them taste a million times better! I gave the kids the grilled chicken and homemade fries along with some grapes for lunch. My sandwich was on two slices of Ezekial bread. I smeared on a good amount of pesto on the bottom slice, topped that with 1/2 of a cut-up chicken breast, then put on some roasted red peppers, and then about 1/8 cup shredded mozzarella cheese. I cooked it in the Foreman, right after the chicken was done. No need for a fancy panini press. I had some of the fries and a few grapes with my delicious sandwich. I like to have lunch be my biggest meal of the day. I am quite frankly too lazy to get up and cook a big breakfast. Maybe not lazy, but unwilling to wake up even earlier to take Clark out so I'd also have time to cook breakfast by the time Pete leaves at 7:30. So we usually just have eggs and toast and cereal. I like to have my carbs with lunch to fuel me for my afternoon workout and then eat a light dinner at night.

This afternoon I started p90x over again. I hope this is the last time I ever say that. Day one went very well since I am practically a pro at those workouts now. Today's workout was Chest and Back, follwed by Ab Ripper x. I did at least 100 REAL pushups during that hour which I sure couldn't do last November when I started p90x the first time. I almost made it through every single rep of ab ripper x which I never thought I could do. I should be able to do it by the end of the month. I didn't stop early during any of the exercises and I really felt that I pushed myself.

Tonight wasn't exactly a light low-carb dinner. We started a new family tradition, about 3 weeks ago, of ordering pizza on Friday nights. It is the first tradition we've ever done as a family. With our Army lifestyle, nothing could ever be planned and Pete missed birthdays and holidays with us. Then when he first got home, I worked evenings and we never got to eat as a family. Then, he got a job with Schwans and never got home til 10 or later. It's really silly but it makes me feel like a normal family. I know I shouldn't be associating food with family memories, but it is what it is. Friday night is my once a week "cheat" for now. I had four pieces of square pizza, so about the size of 2 slices of an 8-piece frozen pizza. And a cheese-filled breadstick dipped in pizza sauce. I have had days where I ate half of an extra large pizza. Not tonight, not anymore. I can stop now.

I was craving ice cream after dinner so I decided to make some clean banana-based ice cream. I used 1 cup of milk, 4 frozen bananas, 2 tbsp agave, 2 tbsp cocoa powder, and 2 tbsp peanut butter. It was my first time adding peanut butter and it seemed like such a great idea at the time. It didn't really taste so great to me. I'll omit that next time.

All and all, I'd say today was a pretty good day for me. I am trying to not feel guilty of my scheduled Friday indulgence. Tomorrow I'd like to go for a long run--see what kind of distance I am capable of running now. I might take the kids...I'll just have to see what tomorrow brings! And of course, do my p90x workout. Plyometrics. It's a great calorie-burning workout so I should be needing two showers again tomorrow :)
Thursday, August 19, 2010 | By: Tangy

Let's try this again.

I have been bad. Not just a little bad, but B-A-D!! I have been skipping workouts and eating too much junk! And not updating on here at all!! But all of this is about to change :)

I have been slightly obsessed with a certain social networking site for about three and a half years now. Back in the day when I still used Myspace, I noticed an add for a site for moms. I immediately went to check it out and just like that--I was hooked. I was 22 years old. I had recently moved 1000 miles away from my family and friends and life as I knew it to be with my husband Pete at Fort Hood, Texas. Right before our move, I was working two jobs--one at a hospital, one at a pharmacy, and going to school full-time. We got married September 3, 2005, as high school sweethearts and after two years of dating. By the end of September 2005, Pete was gone for Basic Training at Fort Knox and then left for AIT in Maryland. I got to see him twice during this time, once at Basic graduation and then for a week he got off for Christmas. Not your typical newlyweds! Shortly after I rang in 2006 alone, I found out I was pregnant. Then we found out about our orders to go to Fort Hood. We moved to Copperas Cove, Texas, when I was five months pregnant. I tried to find a job right away but no one would hire me. Hmm who would want to hire a big pregnant lady? So for the first time since I was 14 I didn't have a job!! I spent my time reading and eating and watching tv instead of going out and trying to make friends.

On September 12, 2006, our son Peter was born. 9 lbs, 2 oz. Big boy! I was still adjusting to being married and finally getting to be with my husband and living in a new state in an entirely different geographic region with military culture. Then I had a baby to add to the mix! Then, when Peter was only six weeks old, Pete left for his first deployment to Iraq. Here I was, 22, completely alone, with a brand new baby and no familiar faces. I was more than a little overwhelmed. I think I spent the first three days after Pete left just walking around crying. But I couldn't go on like that. I had bills to pay, a small apartment to maintain, and a newborn to take care of. There was no one else to do these things for me or help me out. I had to grow up a lot. My feelings of loneliness were so strong as well as my uncertainty of a first-time mom. So Cafemom felt like a God-sent!

I "met" so many people those first few months of being on that site. I found a local mom's group full of moms just like me--young with little kids who knew what it was like to be a military wife! Score! And so many other kinds of women. I realized I had led a pretty sheltered life up to that time. I made some friendships there in Texas as well as many others from afar. I think it really helped me get through that fifteen month deployment. I finally had support and some adult interaction. I started to feel like Tangy again. It was nice.

Now I'm not writing this to be all nostalgic, and you may be wondering, what the heck does this have to do with my weight loss? Cafemom means so much to me on so many levels. It has been part of my life longer than my daughter has. I have let it get too far. It has become too all-consuming. I care so much about everyone on there and can't wait to see the latest story that I have been putting myself and my family on the back burner. I have to distance myself for a while. I have been spending more time online every day than working out or reading to my kids, and that is a problem. So I am taking a little break. It will KILL me. I will be so tempted to log in real quick on my phone, but I am not even going to do that. I have to spend my time doing other things. Like cleaning so that during naptime I can go workout instead of cleaning up for two hours.

I am going to re-commit myself to working out and eating clean. This is going to be a big challenge for me because I have commitment issues with changing my life. I can't ever seem to stick with anything!! I know I have to change my habits if I want to see any results. Starting tomorrow I will be logging in everything I eat and every workout I do or Don't do. I will learn what works for me and what doesn't by being completely honest with myself. And with whoever else wants to see.

Something important I am going to start doing--setting goals for the next day. Tomorrow's goals: wake up and go running with Clark, clean my house throughout the day, do p90x at naptime, make a clean family meal for dinner, and keep my carb intake in check. I'll be back tomorrow!
Sunday, August 1, 2010 | By: Tangy

30 days- Day 1

I haven't been around much these past couple of weeks. I've been busy stuffing my face and not working out. I gained back the couple of pounds I had lost, bringing me even further away from my goal. While I was eating mostly clean, I was eating too much clean junk food. I am challenging myself to lose weight this month. I hate to put a number on the exact amount I'd like to lose, but 5-10 lbs would be ideal. I am going to start following Jillian Michaels' Making the Cut to help me lose this last bit of weight I've been struggling to lose for over a year now. I'm going to track every bite of food I put in my mouth and be more honest with myself than I've ever been. I don't know why it is so hard to admit to myself that I have been messing up!

I'm also starting my second round of p90x: days 30-60. I know I have not changed much from day one and it kills me I can't take 30 day progress pictures! I *will* be taking day 60 pictures! I am doing p90x doubles and replacing cardio x with either biking or running. I do have alterior motives; besides wanting to shed some pounds and get in the best shape of my life, I have a 5k coming up in two weeks and I am doing a triathlon challenge on Cafemom so I have many fitness goals all at once but I have never been this motivated!

Day 1- Aug 1

breakfast- 1 cup of coffee, 2 eggs, 1 cup Kashi Heart to Heart

snack- didn't happen...we went to church during this time

lunch- was supposed to be a salad with chicken is not cooked! So I had some blue corn chips with roasted red pepper hummus

snack- reheated cup of coffee that I didn't drink with breakfast, 7 kashi heart to heart crackers with laughing cow cheese

snack #2- I was shaking, I was so hungry!!! Was out for a walk with the kiddos, came home and everything was a haze. Had 2 tbsp pb on a graham cracker

dinner- 1.5 grilled chicken breasts, 1 med sweet potato

snack- smoothie with 3/4 cup kefir, 1 cup baby spinach, 1 cup cherries, 1 scoop chocolate whey, 1 tbsp flax

workout- p90x back and biceps with ab ripper x